Happy Holidays Dudes!

In celebration of Christmas being a few days away, here's a little doozy to get you in the holiday spirit. So place another log in the fireplace and snuggle up with your loved ones. Ahh! Now, where the crap are my happy pills?!?!

Aloha from California?

As random as my mom can be, my dad loves sticking to a set schedule. It's a wonder that they get along at all. He's meticulous at everything he does, especially when it comes to his gardening. He's like a cross between Thomas Edison and Al Bundy. I never knew pineapples grew anywhere other than Hawaii, but my dad made it a mission of his to create his very own California pineapples.



My dad got the idea about 7 years ago, and I have no idea how he did it, but through research, experimentation, and a whole lot of patience, my dad was able to grow his very first pineapple 2 years later.



He took me through the process over the weekend and I learned a whole bunch of stuff that I never even considered. The "seed" is actually the top of the previous pineapple. You know, the spiky, leafy, things.



Once the top is soaked and planted, the leaves grow into a huge bush that's about 3 feet high. About 7 months later, a bud forms at the end of a stem above the center of the bush. That bud looks like a miniature pineapple. It then grows for another 5 months til it gets big and orange like the pineapples we're used to seeing. How bizarre is that? If you think about it, that crazy thing grows from the top from the original pineapple. It's like having a baby grow from your hair or something.



The pineapples are now ready to pick! My dad says they're as sweet as any you buy from the supermarket. My mom wouldn't try one if you paid her, she just rolls her eyes. I give my old man a lot of credit for sticking with something for so long and getting it right, despite zero support from the Mrs's. Unfortunately he didn't pass that attitude to me. I sleep all day. His 1 pineapple total from 5 years ago has now ballooned to 26 this year. Way to go dad!

Happy Mother's Day!!!

My mom was nice enough to visit me at the office last week. Here's a picture of her next to one of the Ratatouille posters in the lobby. She looks happy enough and we were having a nice day, but things took a turn for the bizarre about 2 seconds after I shot this. Every now and then, the craziest, far-fetched, and completely random idea will pop into my mom's head. Thank god it's wasn't passed on genetically to me (or was it?). In this case, she decided all of a sudden that she wanted to take the poster with her. I immediately told her that she was completely nuts and I think they'll notice if it's missing. That thing's like 10 feet tall for crying out loud. She responded by lifting the thing off the wall from the bottom to see how it was hung. I had no idea why she wanted it since there is no space in her house to hang it, let alone any way to haul it back with her to San Diego. I stood there stunned. She asked me to help her unhinge it and I thought I was gonna throw up. About 20 minutes later, as I lay motionless on the floor, she fortunately gave up on the idea when she found out we had a Starbucks in the cafeteria. Funny thing is, the sight of my 5' mom trying to wrestle a 10' poster off the wall was worth it alone. I had a good laugh after I got over the terror of it all. What i didn't tell her was that a security camera was pointed right at her the whole time. That's gotta be some ridiculous footage. If anything, it could prove my innocence in court while mom sat in jail for stealing company property. Happy Mother's Day mom!

Play Ball!

Now that the baseball season is in full swing, I thought I'd dig up a little project I completed last season. Being from San Diego, the Dodgers were always our bitter rivals. Mainly cuz they would kick our asses every year. Everything Dodger blue made my stomach turn, but putting that hate aside was easy when they asked me if I wanted to design their mascot. As far as I know, they've never really had a true mascot, so the opportunity was one I could never pass up. I'm also quite the sellout, especially if it involves free seats behind 1st base. That mascot became Ebbett, a trolley that ties in their storied past as the Brooklyn "trolley" Dodgers. Now if they could only find a way to make him into a big, fat suit that runs around at games.