Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Aloha from California?

As random as my mom can be, my dad loves sticking to a set schedule. It's a wonder that they get along at all. He's meticulous at everything he does, especially when it comes to his gardening. He's like a cross between Thomas Edison and Al Bundy. I never knew pineapples grew anywhere other than Hawaii, but my dad made it a mission of his to create his very own California pineapples.

My dad got the idea about 7 years ago, and I have no idea how he did it, but through research, experimentation, and a whole lot of patience, my dad was able to grow his very first pineapple 2 years later.

He took me through the process over the weekend and I learned a whole bunch of stuff that I never even considered. The "seed" is actually the top of the previous pineapple. You know, the spiky, leafy, things.

Once the top is soaked and planted, the leaves grow into a huge bush that's about 3 feet high. About 7 months later, a bud forms at the end of a stem above the center of the bush. That bud looks like a miniature pineapple. It then grows for another 5 months til it gets big and orange like the pineapples we're used to seeing. How bizarre is that? If you think about it, that crazy thing grows from the top from the original pineapple. It's like having a baby grow from your hair or something.

The pineapples are now ready to pick! My dad says they're as sweet as any you buy from the supermarket. My mom wouldn't try one if you paid her, she just rolls her eyes. I give my old man a lot of credit for sticking with something for so long and getting it right, despite zero support from the Mrs's. Unfortunately he didn't pass that attitude to me. I sleep all day. His 1 pineapple total from 5 years ago has now ballooned to 26 this year. Way to go dad!


nic said...

Great story, Tan. That is an amazing accomplishment; to wait for something to grow for that long. I need to pass your link to everyone I met who thinks pineapples grow on trees... :D

Anonymous said...

Man, I wish my parents were interesting.

Larry said...

Dude, I'm glad you took up bloging. Great stories.

Tanner said...

I thought the grew underground or something. Funny, Hutch. I'm sure they're as badass as their offspring. Thanks Larry! You've set the bar as far as amazing blogger stories. Keep the food reviews coming.

richtuzon said...

wow...I learn something new every year (or so)...thanks for the report. you and your dad get an "A".

Ry's Photo Blog said...

Pineapple Baby!!!!

Tanner said...

An 'A'? F yeah!!! First one I ever got! Damn Rich, maybe i shouldn't have tried so hard on all those school reports.

Ry, Let's take them pineapples to igloo baby!!

jecs said...

what makes canadian bacon hawaiin? conspiracy? im pressin for a full investigation!!

Tanner said...

Damn Jecs! What the hell you doing up at midnight? I'll meet you @ Super Sergio's.

Vince M. said...

Love the parent stories, they sound like fun people.

John T. Quinn 3rd said...

this is what it's all about. your father loves those pinapples and that nurturing and nuanced care is what brings those babies to fruition. the older i get the more patient and diligent i've become in my garden. we have a bunch of cactus and it has taken some years but, they're really coming along and once a year, for a couple of days we get the most spectacular fireworks display of flowers.
the frost from Martin Luther King's birthday weekend nearly killed everything in the garden. but, we clipped the damaged stuff, nurtured them back to health and now they're more beautiful then ever.
i guess i'm getting old but, i love my garden.

Tanner said...

Thanks John! I'll be sure to pass the kind words to my old man. I already know he'd go nuts to see the cactus flowers. Don't think he's had any of those yet. It's inspiring to see the time & effort you guys put into it. I'm hoping it'll help me (one of the the most impatient s.o.b.s around) to see that side of life.

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Anonymous said...

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they may be professionals or freshers they may be form US Native (for
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Moira said...

Your dad is adorable XDDD
And your parents sound like a fun couple to be an audience to~

I knew pineapples grew like that, since my mum always tells me about foods in the Philippines. She told me she thought artichoke plants were pineapple plants when she first saw them :)

(Have you seen those before? I assume that, since you're from CA like me, you've seen them at least once. The two look really similar, actually, in case you haven't.)

But even though I already knew how they grew, I didn't know that they would succeed in CA :).

Sounds like he's got a right miniature nursery going on there. Hope that it prospers, though it definitely already seems to be doing wonderfully~

Tanner said...

Thanks Moira! I'll pass the compliments on to my dad. If I tell him you think he's adorable, he'll immediately tuck his shirt in, fix his hair, and suck his beer gut in. He does that every time women say something nice :) You're right, artichokes look just like them. He's grown those too & I think he's on a mission to grow every single fruit or vegetable in that yard of his. My filipino mom has tried for years to get him to grow that big yellow bitter melon. He did once, hated the stew she made with it, and never grew them again. It got ugly at the house for a while! Maybe he can grow ube? I like ube! Is that even a vegetable???

Moira said...

Ahh,I hate bitter melon! Yech.
But how ambitious, growing all those types of plants :)
Yeah, ube is great! I bet it's easier than pineapple, too, since it's a tuber. Like a potato. Not sure if you would call it a vegetable or a starch or whatnot, though XD

(I'm surprised your mum hasn't tried to get him to grow ube or langka yet, seeing as those make wonderful Pinoy desserts. Or even mango; that's really hard to grow, and it takes forever to fruit. But those are much tastier than bitter melon!)

Tanner said...

Haha! So you can relate to the bitter melon! The entire house would smell when she'd cook it. I'll definitely push him to try the ube & langka. At least it would make the Mrs. happy. Thanks for the recommendation Moira! Btw, how did you come across the blog? I rarely get any comments that aren't related to art...which is great cuz I like the mom and dad stories the most :)

Moira said...

Ahaha, I stumbled upon it just this week, and the connection does relate to your artwork, actually. Someone posted a link to your blog and pictures of some of the gorgeous posters you've done in their blog, basically saying "OMG THIS DUDE IS SOOOOO AWESOME BUT WHY ARE THE POSTERS SO EXPENNNSSSIIVVVEEE?!?!111one".

Had to check out the blog link, since the posters' style strongly reminded me of some of the stuff from the Incredibles movie/franchise, and I freaking love that movie. (I was pretty happy when my hunch was vindicated XD.)

And while I have read some of your other posts, I commented on this post because the picture of the pineapple (sept 30) caught my eye :)
That, and I'm pretty sure that all I'd probably be able to say on your artwork posts is the same as everyone else. [Insert generic "omg u have such cool/awesome/nice work" and "good job,(man or your choice of other term of familiarity)" comments here]

Tanner said...

Haha! Got it! My fingers were crossed that my blog pineapple story somehow ended up on "Better Homes and Garden" magazine or something :) Sorry dad, maybe next time :( Thanks for the implied poster compliments! The Incredibles is definitely one of my faves too and it kinda started me on this whole poster thing. Trust me, I had no idea they'd charge as much for them as they do. I can't even aford my own stuff!!! Haha! Wait, where's your blog?? I can't get in!

MissMercurial said...

[missmercurial=moira, btw]

Nope, sorry Mr.Tan, Sr. ahah :)

You're welcome for the comments about the posters. They are well-deserved.

The artist can't afford his own work.
That's just wrong. They should at least give you, like, a free copy or something for making it.

As to my blog: actually...I don't have one^^;
*is certifiably lame*
You probably see a link under my name since I'm writing this under my Google id, which, apparently, works on blogger? So maybe I have a blogger profile as a consequence of having a Google account and don't know it...:)

I'll probably start one (a blog, I mean) once I have anything worth posting/commenting on and/or the time to keep one consistently updated.

I do have a deviantART account, but it's so infrequently updated and full of really, REALLY old and shoddy works that it's kind of embarrassing.

.....if it must be seen, it's here:

so embarrassing (||'__' )
*stuffs gallery into a dark corner*

My hope is that one day I won't be as embarrassed to give out that link because my works will be closer to your level and the level of other artists whose work I admire. In short, better and more professional.
(Or, at least, somewhat closer.)

Tanner said...

Thanks for the link Moira/MissMercurial! Not sure if I'm following it right. I clicked on the gallery tab and it's empty. What am I doing wrong? Anyway, I would just show everything you can and not be embarrassed about it. And just be yourself with your work. That way, you can never be wrong. It's such a subjective medium anyway. I do see a lot of portfolios and in my opinion, the biggest mistake one can make is to mimic a particular artists' style, a trend or a genre. Those are always the easiest to scrutinize and pick apart. Above all, have fun with whatever you're doing and don't try to reach a 'level' of someone who's out there. You'll just drive yourself nuts. I sound preachy huh? Sorry!

MissMercurial said...

It's only embarrassing because it's like a kindergartener claiming that their doodles deserve equal magnitudes of attention as the portfolio of a studio art major in college. That and some of the stuff I do have in my gallery are so different in either the subject matter, the piece's execution, or both, from what I would like to do now that it's cringeworthy. I look at them and think "WHY was I proud of that?!" It's the vast difference in quality that's embarrassing.

Although, some of it isn't mortifying. Just most of it.

You can't see anything since I literally shoved everything into a corner long before I gave you that link, that is, into the "Old works" folder on the side bar (click "Browse" on the top bar, since there's two pieces not in that folder that are more recent and wouldn't be seen if you only hit "Old works"). Or, hit "Scrapbook" and you'll see my scraps. Which are even more ancient than the folder of old works.

It's not that I want to imitate someone's/a genre's style as much as I want to raise the level of quality in what I produce, since I think that I could do better with a little more effort or time or practice or some other variable. That's the level I want to get to, that is, to have enough experience to produce works that come out as well as those of artists whom I admire.

I recognize that imitation is not the way to go, so don't worry. Tried that once awhile back and it didn't work out well...
Besides, I'm much too lazy to try and force whatever I do to fit the very particular aesthetic restraints in compliance of only one style or another, although I do tend to comply with some general restraints just because that's what I have more experience doing.

And hey, you have full rights to be preachy, not that you were. XD